the power behind the throne, part two

That was a lovely chat with WM’s bovine supporters, wasn’t it? How about meeting the irreplaceable, unstoppable confidantes and supporters that are based in Dublin?

(What do you mean, there’s only one who agreed to be interviewed? Fine. Send him in..)

The interviewee declined the use of a current photo, asking that we use one of him “in better times”. Request was granted:


Now that’s fancy. I’m just saying, I love a man who can accessorise..

Well, it is really nice to meet you, [name redacted, hereafter referred to as The Significant Other]! Thanks for coming along today. So, yourself and herself live in cosy bliss somewhere on Dublin’s northside. How do you find that?

*shaking hands reach for whiskey bottle and glass* I.. PLEASE TURN THE LIGHT OFF!!!

I’m sorry, I’m a little.. jumpy *laughter with a hysterical tinge*. In the dark, you can’t see the beads rolling all over the floor, the couch.. THEY’VE TAKEN OVER THE HOUSE! I CAN’T BREATHE!!

*affixes oxygen mask to face and breathes deeply* Ah, that eases the pain. You were saying?

I.. Uh.. it must be exciting to see her working on new pieces all the time!

*bitter laughter* Oh yeah, exciting. It’s an exciting merry-go-round of terror, chocolate chip cookies and the ‘tik-tik-tiktiktik’ sound of beads rolling all over the floor. Now I even hear that infernal sound in my dreams…

*thousand yard stare of the kind you see on war veterans, continues*

If I try to tidy up or even touch her precious beading books, she’ll cut off another finger. We can’t even go on holiday in case she sees a bead shop and.. *dissolves into tears, rocks back and forth*

Um.. do you need a moment? Really, we can do this another time..


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